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Posts Tagged ‘People’
Is That The Dalai Lama With A Veggie Burger On His Head?
Posted in Humor, Humour, tagged Blogs, China, Current Affairs, Humor, Humour, Images, People, Tibet, Vegetarianism on April 11, 2013 | 23 Comments »
Somebody Asked To See The David Niven Wearing A Wagon Wheel Image Again…..
Posted in ginger, humor, nonsense, Humor, Humour, Movies, Random Thoughts, tagged Art, Da Vinci, David Niven, Humor, Humour, Movies, People, Photographs, Picasso, Show Business, Steve McQueen on March 20, 2013 | 13 Comments »
Someboday has asked to see the David Niven With A Wagon Wheel On His Head Image again – as always happy to oblige!
A Sad End To A Great Career
Somebody has asked to see the Leonardo Da Vinci wearing a yorkshire pudding on his head image again – as always happy to oblige!
The Da Vinci – A Batter Design
Somebody has asked to see the Steve McQueen Great Escape image again – as always happy to oblige !
Chinstrap!
Last week somebody asked to see Picasso smoking his fishfingers……What a strange world we live in.
During His Fish Period
Ginger Cooking – With Fanny Redcrack
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Aging, Chefs, Cooking, Cooking Advice, Humor, Humour, People, Random, Show Business, Television on March 18, 2013 | 21 Comments »
Dear Fanny,
I’m in a spot of bother with the local Constabulary.
As you know Fanny, the present food trend is to forage for one’s own herbs. After a night taking part in a little wild garlic gathering on Hampstead Heath, I found myself on the wrong end of a policeman’s truncheon. After a bit of a kerfuffle, he summoned the help of his uniformed friend, whose helmet I managed to grab with both hands before giving it a rather tight squeeze.
This only enraged the young officer. He handcuffed me to a tree where his chum layed into me good and proper! I was released and returned to my car which was illegally parked. I’ve since received a rather large vehicle recovery bill from the local force.
Do you have a nice recipe using wild garlic?
Benny
Fanny Replies;
Ah the joys of foraging! Believed to be invented in 1983, foraging has once again become a must for all celebrity chefs.
From Hesgota Bloomincheek to the little fat Ginger Cooking God that is Anthony Whata Thieving Tosspot. They’re all at it! JUST BUY SOME F@CKING HERBS YOU TIGHT BASTARDS!
Anyway, your recipe Benny.
Nettle & Wild Garlic Soup.
Ingredients:
Large bunch of nettles.
Ditto wild garlic.
1 sliced leek
1 finely chopped onion
1 bottle of chardonnay.
1/2 litre of vegetable stock.
Large slug of brandy.
Cream
1 large spliff
Chill.
Make the soup…..in a pot….with all the soup stuff….
….eat the soup
Somebody Asked To See The Leonardo Da Vinci Wearing a Yorkshire Pudding Image Again…..
Posted in Art, ginger, humor, nonsense, History, Humor, Humour, Movies, Random Thoughts, tagged Art, Blogs, Da Vinci, Humor, Humour, Movies, People, Photographs, Picasso, Show Business, Steve McQueen on March 9, 2013 | 23 Comments »
Somebody has asked to see the Leonardo Da Vinci wearing a yorkshire pudding on his head image again – as always happy to oblige!
The Da Vinci – A Batter Design
Somebody has asked to see the Steve McQueen Great Escape image again – as always happy to oblige !
Chinstrap!
Last week somebody asked to see Picasso smoking his fishfingers……What a strange world we live in.
During His Fish Period
Ginger Beauty – With Oily George
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Blogging, Comedy, Ebay, Funny, Humor, Humour, Love, People, Sex, The Body on January 22, 2013 | 5 Comments »
Hello Oily,
Foraging in the attic the other day I came across a false leg once owned by my Aunt Claire. Often wonder where she is. Last I heard she was opening a chain of shops selling cheap jewellery. Now bankrupt I’d imagine. The way of the High Street it seems.
To get back to my point. The leg got me thinking. I’m kinda lonely.What if I was to go onto Ebay and buy some more lady parts? I could build my own girlfriend. We could talk, hug, maybe even make love puddles together. Good idea or am I a freak?
Hans Lecter
Straightjacket City
Oily Replies;
A wonderful idea!
A variant of this was done by a dear friend and fiend of mine Norman Bates some 50 years ago in the US. It worked for him for sure. And he had a very successful motel business which would probably still be going strong – and smelling even stronger – if the corporate chains hadn’t taken over.
Your question raises a very serious issue about today’s society. In an extensive survey that I made up this morning in the shower it was PROVEN BEYOND DOUBT that in just ONE street in East London MORE people live ALONE than in the WHOLE of the street across way.
To me this shows irrefutably that there needs to be more kink in everyone’s lives. It will ease the loneliness.
To get you started I have a special offer. If you buy 30 of my DVD’s within the next 14 days I will throw in a litre of my oil PLUS a battery operated arm. Vital when your own hand locks. Just let me know if you are a righty or lefty and we can get it off and thus get you off, as soon as possible.
Say No to Mr Lonely!
Oily- The Caregiver.
Train Safety – Queensland Australia Style
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Animation, Australia, Blogs, Etiquette, Humor, Humour, Music, People, Songs, Trains on January 15, 2013 | 4 Comments »
Hello
As you know we love a train story on Gfb. Well, here is a little ditty from the Queensland Rail authority urging safety on the tracks.
And a shorty on train etiquette!
Ginger Cooking – With Fanny Redcrack
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Aging, Chefs, Cooking, Cooking Advice, Humor, Humour, People, Random, Show Business, Television on January 8, 2013 | 8 Comments »
Dear Fanny,
My New Year’s resolution is to lose a few pounds in weight so the wife will let me back into our marital bed.
I’ve been inspired by our Olympic heroes over the summer and have taken up the discus. I don’t actually have a discus so I’ve cellotaped some batteries to a frisbee and painted it silver. The trouble is I’m 32 stone and I suffer from terrible chafing.
I’ve tried every cream on the market but my inner buttocks are like mince meat. Could you tell me what face cream you use to keep you looking so incredibly youthful as I think this might be of help?
Keith from Didcot.
Darling Keith,
I’ve used a blend of Goose fat and Gin for as long as I can remember.
After my morning ablutions I apply the goose fat directly onto the face and take half a bottle of gin orally. Whilst the goose fat penetrates I will watch an episode of my favourite programme ” Jeremy Kyle”. He’s such a cad and absolutely adorable!
I think you’ll agree I don’t look anywhere near my 48 years. You could even spice up your marriage by asking your beloved wife if she’d like to smear it on the affected areas. She’ll probably need some of the Gin first though.
Fannois
Pointless Ginger Wig Adaptations #7 – Gandhi
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged 2013, Gandhi, Humor, Humour, Icons, India, News, People, Politics on December 31, 2012 | 11 Comments »
If We Can Find Nonsense On This Scale For 2013 We Will Be Doing OK!
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged 2013, Art, Blogging, Funny, Humor, Humour, New Year, Painting, People, Spain on December 31, 2012 | 13 Comments »
Happy New Year Folks,
I hope you’ve had as much of a giggle at the nonsenses served up on Gfb as I have. As it is a time for reflection, nay, cogitation Cecilia Giminez’s efforts at mural restoration still has me roaring with laughter.
Print it off and stick it on your foreheads for a day to give millions of people and their pets a chortle or two at the start of the New Year!
You may recall Cecilia taking her brush to Ecce Homo in The Sanctuary of Mercy Church near Zaragoza.
An official declared, “The once-dignified portrait now resembles a crayon sketch of a very hairy monkey in an ill-fitting tunic.”
Gfb did its bit to restore the restoration so to speak.
Revisiting the image after a couple of Jameson’s over Crimbo has only further convinced us of the similarity to another well known “hairy monkey in an ill fitting tunic”.
The Resemblance Is Uncanny!
When Bob’s On The Pot He Likes To Read A Lot (It’s A Man Thing!)
Posted in Uncategorized, tagged Britain, Christmas, Comedy, Drink, Gifts, Humor, Humour, People, Satire, Stories, Violence, Writing on December 27, 2012 | 8 Comments »
Hello,
I hope you enjoyed Christmas.
I got a new ointment for my rash, the box set of Smokey And The Bandit and a jumper. I wore the jumper down to the Pickled Filtrum for the traditional Xmas lunchtime pint. My mate Stabman used it to wipe blood up from the pub floor. He saw a man drinking Guinness. He has a thing about people drinking Guinness in confined spaces does Stabman. This and his psychotic condition make for uneasy bedfellows.
It was nice to have our son Lawrence home from the Young Offenders Institute for the day. You should have seen his face when he unwrapped the Ankle Tag cover Shirley had knitted for him! Although he appreciated the crafty stash pouch hidden in Santa’s beard. Thinks of everything does Shirl.
As I nipped in to the smallest room to unburden myself of the Brussels, Shirl stops me at the door, thrusts a can of Haze “Scents Of The Forest” into my hand and said, “Use this and get yer arse into town in five minutes.” This didn’t give me the time to study racing form. I had to settle on Substance Abuse in the 2.30 at Kempton (I thought Lawrence being home was an omen regarding drug use). It romped in seventh.
Why town? For some reason Shirley wasn’t too impressed with my gifts of a toasted sandwich maker and a wind up torch. Handy, practical and self cleaning gifts never seem to go down well. But I should have learned after the mobile dishwasher I bought last year.
But at least I kept the receipts and didn’t have the need of Stabman’s intervention in Argos last year. That was messy.
Laters.
Bob
You can read more of Bob’s musings whilst on the pot here and here. Your lives will be infinitely richer for doing so.
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