Hello Oily
Any advice on how to cure an aching jaw? I think I have been spoiling my girl a bit too much over the Christmas holidays. Help!!
Otis Elevator, LA
Otis my man, long time no speak.
As you are in the same lather and spank market as I – you will understand lockjaw is a common occurrence especially after the 16th retake.
As I know from personal experience, the tongue and lower jaw can only withstand a certain amount of repetitive strain before seizing up. It needs to be kept supple and oiled. Of course I produce my own queasily unnatural unctions so it is never a problem.
I will send you a quart of my Healing Oil and you will be able to lick ‘n flick to your heart’s content.
In return perhaps you could send me that DVD of your girl and her netball teams Xmas party? You know, the one with the ping pong balls?
The Oilster
You wrote this for me. I wish I had Oily’s Healing Oil.
The online store will be opening shortly Andra and all of Oily’s tonics, tinctures and potions will be available!
I remember hearing reports of Oily’s lockjaw while filming his brilliant and critically lauded soliloquy in Julius Caesar during the reopening of the Globe Theate-
What?
Different Oily?
Oops…
Same one – the adult Julius Ceasar had the famous line “Ate Two Brute?”
Oily should know with a name like that!
It is as if fate has intervened Susie!
Oily is a good advisor
The best Harry!
But nobody should expect to have Oily’s lingual stamina. … Oh my … fortunes await selling this oil via an infomercial.
Millions!