Agnes DuPont tells us more about her previous lives!!!!!! Read other lies here and here!.

To connect with previous lives, Agnes eats cheese and brocoli. Separately.

Hello People,

Last Wednesday I was in the Greengrocer’s buying apples, oranges, parsnips and bananas.

As I was handing over my money to Barney the Greengrocer, a very nice man with knock knees, I felt a tad woozy and wobbly. When it had gone, I was on the floor, legs akimbo, surrounded by root vegetables, but with an overwhelming urge to conquer Europe.

The spirit of Napoleon Bonaparte had entered me!

He really is a cheeky little Corsican is Boney! Before I could say “Not tonight Josephine” I boarded the 149 bus and set an eastward course to conquer Austria and Hungary whilst at the same time devising a metricated measuring system and perfecting the kiss curl.

I think i was accompanied by my Imperial Guard – all fine brocaded men sporting heavy calves and brandy breath.

As I hummed the fine Abba tune “Waterloo”, (little was I to know!) my epic journey of conquest was cut short when the bus broke down outside the Duke of Wellington in Shoreditch High Street. Ironic really.

I had to walk home but finally understood the wonders of the metric system.

No longer will I be enslaved by the ounce!

You may think I am a fantasist who eats cheese and broccoli long into the night……….I would beg to differ.

Regards,

Agnes